Entries in career (5)
Are you quitting your job to be a full-time mommy?
I've been asked that question a lot since I announced my resignation from CBS Interactive on Thursday. It's a natural question but the answer is no. Sort of no.
I've been a full-time mommy since my son was born. You don't get a break from being a mommy. So the question is not "Are you going to be a full-time mommy?" but instead "Are you going to stop pursuing a career and just be a mommy?"
And the answer is still no.
While I've always fashioned myself as a woman who needed a successful career, the idea of focusing all of my energy on my family is surprisingly appealing. I never thought I'd be of that mindset. But when I think of giving it all up in order to join daytime Mommy And Me music classes and putting my Beaba Babycook into overdrive, I know that isn't the right thing for me either.
I want things. I have goals that I have yet to accomplish. I want a pursuit outside of this family and I want my family to be proud of me. But I do want to focus more energy on my family too. I am looking forward to more time and flexibility with my husband and Baby Mo.
I'm still not sure how my work/family life will balance out but I am trying to focus my energy on finding a new challenge that is flexible, lucrative, and rewarding. I am willing it with everything I have!
A lot of people have their derisions about why I would leave a good job like the one I currently have and whether or not I should stay home with my baby. I appreciate the concern and speculation but the truth of the matter is this:
- I don't have another job lined up. Really!
- I am not leaving for TWiT. I haven't even been asked.
- I will not be auditioning for The Real Housewives of New York City.
- I already am a full-time mommy. But I have a career too. Even if no one is paying me for it yet.
After six months maternity leave, I've accepted a consulting project working with Mozilla, makers of the Firefox Web browser, which I use and love! I'm excited to get started. One thing I know about myself is that I function much better when I have lots going on at the same time. I thrive off of priorities, planning and checking things off my "to do" list (sick, I know). There is a part of me that is also a bit nervous. I've always had a challenge of work/life balance because I want to give 110% to each part of my life. Now that I am a Mother I know I will need to do a better job managing this.
My goal is to do a kick a$$ job with this project while continuing to be a SUPER Mother and wife. I admire any parent who manages a fulltime career and family. I can only imagine how taxing it is trying to fit everything in. I feel very lucky to be able to do something that I love and that I'm good at while still being super involved with Taz.
We all lead busy lives. Babies, significant other, family, friends, career, etc. Since having Taz, my attention has been so laser focused on motherhood and family that I've let other parts of my life fall to my side (and rightfully so). But, a balanced life is a key to happy...sane life! How do you figure out what part of your life needs attention so that you can make it more balanced? Reaching into my bag of coaching resources, I want to share The Wheel of Life, a little tool to help you figure this out. Sometimes all you need is a little focus to get you headed in the right direction.
Take a few minutes and fill out The Wheel of Life (below). The eight sections of the wheel represent balance. Rank your level of satisfaction with each area of life by placing a number from 1 to 10 in each (10 being very satisfied and 1 being not so satisfied). It's way to see where you're most satisfied and where you could focus your attention on a little more.
I went through this exercise about a month ago and I'm already feeling like I have a bit more balance in my life. I had rated "Family & Friends" a 7. For me, the family part is actually perfect but I've been so focused on just family that I've been missing my friends. Since then, I've reconnected with some great friends and have made a huge effort to plan more outings with them. Now, I would rate "Family & Friends" a 9! Consistency will make this a 10!
When you're done filling out the Wheel, ask yourself these questions:
- What is one area (of your life/the wheel) that you want to focus on?
- Why are you at a [insert number]?
- What number would you like to be at?
- What does that look like?
- What is one action that you can take in the next week to increase this number?
- Will you do it?
How do you rate the areas in your life? Is there one area that is important to you that you want to make better? After completing this exercise feel free to share what you've discovered.